Like any Indian kid my aspirations circulated around becoming a doctor or an engineer. Then I bumped into writing 5 yrs back, which started off as a journal filled with confusion and anger, and I unraveled how disconnected I was with myself. I realised I was envisioning my life through popular opinion. Accepting this fact was overwhelming because life suddenly became a clean slate. You may ask ‘how?’. Well, we are all aware that our culture is all about being involved in each other’s world (which is a good thing as it represents a strong sense of collectivism but then it does become toxic at times), people validate each other’s life based on social standards and the worse part is, we expect validation from others on our own volition, No wonder I wasn’t even aware of what made me happy whilst all this time I thought I was. Setting one’s own standards becomes a completely new territory when all you’ve been taught is to compete with individuals who hold a different story, get a degree and follow the route to reaching an already decided destiny.
Fast forward few years (My way of rebelling with the social baggage I thought was shouldered on me), I had the nerve to approach publishers and I did manage to get one to compile a book with my journals LOL- But I am glad it didn’t work out. All thanks to my editor who rebutted I wasn’t ready, but that moment did crush me for reasons that’s way too embarrassing and inconclusive to admit now. Oh yes! Like any typical young and stubborn boy, I quit writing for a year LOL. I guess it all makes sense to admit- good things take time but if it doesn’t come around then it’s not meant to be. Luckily it did come around and writing has now taken a completely different meaning to me. It has become much more than flaunting it as an art, it makes me live life in ways that make me happy and hopefully help people around me achieve the same. I have learned to live life through words instead of merely playing around with them to make some sense. Writing to me represents something larger than merely trying to create a story by replicating situations.
We are all story tellers, our life in itself is book with empty pages waiting to be filled (I know its a cliché, but no less a fact for it). This companionship which I have garnered with writing has taught me countless lessons and still continues to. And you all know I walk the talk (unlike our #NETAJIS #DEMONETIZATION) so for those inquisitive minds here is a mix bag of thought provoking #GYAN on living your own story.
WE ARE ALL WEIRD AND INSECURE
YES! We all are, so never compensate your awkwardness by trying to be someone you are not- embrace it, that’s what makes you human and relatable.
BEING A VICTIM IS A CHOICE
As Eleanor Roosevelt said, only you give yourself permission to be a victim. Our social structure is rigid for sure, but you’ve ample opportunities to break away from it and lead a life that makes you feel content, which in return helps you to pave the way for people to do the same.
THERE IS ALWAYS A RIGHT TIME
If you are driven by growth there will always be a right time for change to happen (as opposed to the saying there is a never a right time). You just have to keep taking one step at a time.
NO SHORTCUTS PLEASE!
Necessity is the mother of invention not “Juggad”. Getting things done out of desperation might give results, but if you are driven to learn that’s not the best way. Scoring good marks in CA’S by looking “idhar udhar” is one such instance. LOL. Corruption is the trending topic in India these days, but have you ever thought that such issues sprout from very silly practices like cheating to score well in the CA? “Little drops of water make the mighty ocean” my friends!
NEVER BE COMPLACENT
Personally speaking, I am good at accepting failures, but being complacent is something alien to me. Being complacent and staying in the present is often confused by us youngsters. Staying in the present means you are focused right now and not distracted by uncertainty. Complacency on the other hand is when you take things for granted and you’ve got nothing going on (our usual excuse, aahh! I don’t want to think about the future) – You get up and you sleep and everything in between is aimless. And if you may rebut “I go to class “, if going to class was everything why do only 20% out of 3 lakh engineering graduates (annually) get employed?
IF YOU HAVE GOT NOTHING GOOD TO SAY PLEASE DON’T SAY IT
Harvard study distinguishes the young of this generation to be not much for information, but rather for opinion overload. I couldn’t agree more – we just don’t know when to stop. Be it the never ending shenanigans in class or blurting out our mind without thinking twice, we just feel the need to have an opinion about everyone and everything. So as a peer I encourage each one of us to learn to think twice before speaking and listen more – unless you are saying something that’s going to make someone’s day better or make them feel appreciated and uplifted (because honestly this world could use some positivity).
BENEFIT OF DOUBT
This is one principle I strongly believe in- It helps you to understand and treat people in ways that doesn’t create conflict and negativity. Giving people the benefit of doubt means you are capable of putting yourself in someone else’s shoes instead of quickly judging them based on your personal views. Even when situations that create excessive negativity arise, giving others the benefit of doubt helps you to peacefully detach from them.
UNDERSTAND YOUR CRAFT AND MASTER IT
We are all blessed with innate skills but using them in ways that truly justifies your intention for creativity, without getting distracted, is a process that involves gut wrenching frustration and confusion – that’s the price you have pay to master your craft and find your niche. Writing is one such example among many – if you go through the Happenings page, you’ll see all the content creators have a different genre, each filling voids left by others. Some create excellent fictional write-ups while some create high beat and lively content and if I were to imitate them and try to come up with same? I would fail miserably because that’s not my genre. Here’s the good news, there is enough room for everyone to achieve authenticity and pursue something that surpasses the need for reward but you just need to understand your craft and try to find your piece in this huge puzzle.
KEEP AN OPEN MIND AND PERSEVERE
Just because you’ve figured out what you are good at doesn’t mean you’ll hit homerun at one go. In fact you never really will, because if you are really passionate about learning and growing? Achieving one milestone will eventually lead to setting an even bigger goal. Of course it is exhausting, but you learn to enjoy the anxiety and overwhelming rush of emotions every time you achieve or fail because you are living your story. And I would be lying if I say you won’t feel like giving up at times, but then again if you end up sticking with – that’s called living your dream. So keep an open mind and remember everything will fall in its own place at the right time but most importantly keep at it, don’t give up.
We are all in the same boat guys. All trying to keep up with the ever changing world, to stand out among the vast pool of human race as an irreplaceable individual. Some of us have dared to start writing our own story and now it’s your time!
